As of the recent birth of my #2 son, I have noticed a bit of change in my loving wife and figured I had better write about her and all of the new moms in the world and give them the 'props that are much deserved...
First and foremost...THANK GOD that women exist. If the expansion of this species were layed upon the shoulders of MAN, we would have been extinct a long time ago. I dont do pain very well...so the thought of going into labor puts me into a fetal position in a corner crying.
Secondly, I think it should be Mother's Day every day! I dont think that this should be regulated to one day simply because there are plenty of every day occasions that moms encounter that should be rewarded within a baby's first year of life...or thier 18th year of life...
So, Ive taken the liberty to write down a few of these first time occassions that I found in BabyTalk magazine...and the subsequent reward that should be given at that exact moment.
Occasion -- You produce your tenth quart of breast milk...
Present -- You should get a new suede jacket! (Hey, if your gonna get milked like one, you deserve the flashy leather exterior.)
Occasion -- You survive reading Goodnight Moon a total of 58 times in one sitting.
Present -- You should get a telephone, a red balloon, and a great green room at The Plaze Hotel. (You have to read the book to get this joke.)
Occasion -- While changing a hazmat-grade diaper on a public park bench, you run out of baby wipes - then realize that you dont have any diapers in your diaper bag either.
Present -- Therapy!
Occasion -- You go out for a rare hour of "me time" and accidentally spend it napping on a cross-town bus.
Present -- A new designer bag (to replace the one that was stolen from you while napping on the bus)
Occasion -- In search of your baby's favoritce pacifier, you waste half a morning rooting through the trash barrells at the playground.
Present -- A new bottle of Calgon and Chanel No. 5 (But, you swear nothing will cover up that smell...)
Occasion -- You scrub roughly 1,000 flecks of puried squash off the dining room walls, unaware that you're also scubbing off the paint.
Present -- More therapy!
Occasion -- You lovingly record every detail of your child's first month in her baby book.
Present -- A professional planner for her first birthday party (that happens next week!!)
Occasion -- You greet your spouse with girlish enthusiasm after a long day of projectile vomit, projectile poops, and a surprise visit from your in-laws.
Present -- An Academy Award!
So, "Here!! Here!!" I say to those new moms of the world! And another "Here!! Here!!" to those moms that have years under thier belts. If it werent for you, we wouldnt be here!
If you would like information on how to get ready-to-act buyers and sellers from www.recr.com, please call Clint at 800-977-7058.
Clint,
Flat out...hilarious!!!...and true!!! LOL Thanks, Fran
What do I get for almost 19 years, 3 kids, and a graduating senior this week? HUMMMMM.
Amen to your post! We have been blessed with 9 grandkids, and #10 is announced for October!
Clint, from the looks of things, I'd say you are a very smart man.
Fran -- Thanks, brotha! Yup, not a pain kinda guy...one labor pain...bullet to the dome. Guaranteed...LOL!
Paddy -- How about a spot next to the guys on Mt. Rushmore? If I can pull that one off for you, I will! :-)
Mike -- Wow, man! Congrat's! Im not on the grandparent path as of yet, but I have 3 daughters that are on thier way...lol
Susan -- Humbly speaking, Im not that smart. I just give credit where credit is due! (Thanks, mom!) :-)
Okay Clint - whad you do? ; )
I was a stay-at-home Mom for 14 years and loved cleaning up every mess, rinsing every pacifier and removing a Cheerio from a nose (push down on the side of the nose the cheerio is on to break it up - it comes out so much easier!). I would do it all over again as I watch my 21 year old daughter and 18 year old son get ready to leave the nest. No present required.
I will definitely join in with you on thanking all the mothers of the world. I know that mine has made a huge difference in my life.
Clint...
This post is funny and poignant ... you're on a roll my friend!
Clint, Having just finished my 1 zillionth recitation of "Goodnight Moon" (who needs the book, I have it memorizied), I'll take that room at The Plaza.. you can keep the red ballon and the telephone though!!!
Clint... that was great. My kids are gone now, (thank the Lord) but this rekinkled a lot of memories.
Kathy -- See, thats another thing about moms that Im not sure I could do...Id want a present..lol!
JL -- Here, Here! I talk to my mom about once a week or more..and she is still one of my guiding lights.
Richard -- Some days your the windshield...some days your the bug. :-)
Becky -- YEAH!!! Someone that got that joke....LOL! Thank you for reading and commenting!
William -- You are very welcome for the trip...and I thank you for the kind words.
Clint - those were hysterical! Yep - Goodnight Moon I can recite by heart!
Leesa -- Thank you! And, I have met many mothers that can...My wife included...lol. Thanks for commenting!!
Clint,
My daughter is due in October with her first baby making me a Grandpa for the first time. Kids are great but some of the stuff can be overwhelming for the husband - even the best of husbands. Thanks God for Moms!!!! and Grandmas!
Mike
Mike -- Im soooo with you on all of that, my man. Congrat's on becoming a new GrandPa!!! That's awesome! Bring em over for a visit...give them candy and a latte'...and a free puppy. Then send them home. LOL!!!!
Clint,
I have a closet full of toys and candy and I am ready for payback!!
Mike
Mike -- LOL!! Yeah, the first couple of times my son did something really dumb, I called my parents and asked them if I had done that thing...and my mom just laughed at me and hung up the phone. I took that as a 'YES!'
Clint,
Ain't that the truth LOL.
Mike
I think you should substitute the two counts of therapy for a loving husband cooking dinner and cleaning the house. :)
Chris -- That's pretty much the same thing as therapy, isnt it?? :-)
Thanks for yout tasking the time to provide us with this information in the Active Rain network. AR is the new "cyber backbone" of the industry, and with it's uplink to Localism.com it will transfrom the marketplace. Agents who don't see which way the cyberwind is blowing are going to find themselves at a considerable disadvantage inside of three to five years.
Raising 3 kids on my own from the age of 6,4,1 till they were 23, 21,17.........:-) I'd be happy with any one of those awards, prizes, therapy sessions...........how do we get one? lol
Liz -- Congratulations on being a successful single mom!!! Youre a bigger man than me....well....kinda....you know what I mean. LOL!